If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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