This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
