i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
