Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
