Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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