I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize