Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
If I die, sorry about rent.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
