Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
