oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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