I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
