It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
