Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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