You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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