i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
