So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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