So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
