Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
