You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
How's work?
Spinning.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
