If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize