apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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