I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize