so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
