I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
