Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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