So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Are we still banned from the library?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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