ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
