We're facebook friends in real life
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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