I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
