My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
