i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
