You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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