return my video game
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
