We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just saw a hot homeless man
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
