for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Randomize
