Having a random hookup so left but love u
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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