I wanna bring you to show and tell
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
