Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
