Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
