Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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