I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
