Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
