Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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