I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
