meet me or not, i'm out of control
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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