You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
