We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
