Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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