just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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