Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
She needs sedatives and a leash
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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