i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
