your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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